This is an easy one for me because I already do it here is what it is and the why of it.
I currently work as a patient advocate, a role that doesn’t come with a paycheck but is incredibly rewarding. With my skills, life experience, and love for reading medical journals, it made sense for me to take on this role. As a patient advocate, I use my knowledge to help others navigate the complex healthcare system, ensuring they receive the care they need. It’s fulfilling to know that I can make a difference in someone’s life, even if it’s behind the scenes.
With all the skills I have, I often find myself called upon by friends and family, or those connected to me through someone I know. It doesn’t seem to matter what medical discipline is involved; I tend to leave an impression. I start by attending appointments as a concerned friend, asking pointed questions in a way that hides my knowledge but hints that I may know more than I am letting on. After all, you never reveal all your cards. It’s a bit like playing poker, but with stethoscopes and blood tests.
Sometimes, that’s enough to get things on track. Other times, I have to get really involved, such as in the case of a dear friend who was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver due to drinking. It bothered me when I heard about this, so I asked to see the past couple of years of medical records related to this. What I discovered is why I say, “Stop being a compliant patient” to anyone I can. The cause being attributed to alcohol is only done when all other causes are ruled out. It’s a diagnosis of exclusion. There were tests not done, some very basic tests. It turned out that because this friend wasn’t ready to go the transplant route, the doctor decided to write him off. There is no other way to put that one.
At the first appointment, I asked about the blood sugar levels and when they were last checked. I also inquired if it was checked on the genetic level for heavy iron in the blood. I mentioned that I found out about these issues through family who faced similar problems and knew that it could cause this. Yeah, that did not go over well at all. Though they sure rushed to cover their rear ends. Too little too late though. It turned out it was extremely high blood sugar that was the cause, and had that been treated, he would not have had an issue with his liver repairing itself. It was a classic case of the right diagnosis coming too late.
However, the story gets worse. At one of the last admissions, the team that was tending to him was the liver team. I had noticed issues with the blood work being ignored. It was like watching a suspense thriller where you know the ending is going to be bad, but you can’t look away.
The liver team was so focused on the liver that they missed some very big issues. I tried the pointed questions first, then I started to drop hints that I may actually know far more than I was letting on. The next step is revealing my background vaguely. I ended up being at the final step of “I was being polite when I asked. It was more of me telling you to do this.” and yes, I do say this.
See, his blood numbers were out of whack, which indicated that there was something under it all that was not being looked at. I demanded hematology get involved. They had a series of tests that they wanted run, and he also got the first of many transfusions that he should have been getting for quite some time. I also insisted on internal medicine and the kidney teams be consulted. It wasn’t that they had to come see him, but they were to be consulted. You do not focus on the easy answer ever in medicine. More often than not, when there is one issue, there are often other issues that can arise or are part of the delight of the body.
Turned out, due to the liver doctor driving it deeply into my friend to cut back on water more and more every visit—and the nurse practitioner was just as bad—they were never happy with how much fluid he was taking in and it led to kidney failure because it was always too much. Needless to say, my statement at the second appointment ever with those two when I said, “you will either love me, or you will hate me. The choice is yours,” was an understatement of our future interactions. Not only did they have to deal with the cirrhosis diagnosis, but now we also had to tackle the kidney failure they caused. To this day, I am unsure if it was neglect or intentional given the lack of follow-up and appointments that were going on and the pushback. Let’s just say it does not look good for them.
What was sick was at one hospital admission I had to park my ass in my wheelchair in the doorway of his hospital room in such a way that it looked accidental that I was blocking their way. They couldn’t easily leave without being obvious in their dismissal with the god complex raging cause they would have had to move me out of the way. They were forced to listen to why I wanted these teams consulted, and they were told why. By the time I was done, I think they were a little scared. The resident sure was, as anytime we saw him, he would look at me waiting for me to either stay relaxed or get what my friends call “that look” on my face.
So, I ramped up my involvement. I became a fixture at every appointment, every consultation, and every treatment discussion. I wouldn’t let them sidestep the issues anymore. I made sure every test, every possibility was explored. The resident, poor soul, looked like he was walking on eggshells every time he saw me, probably fearing what new demand or pointed question would come his way that he would need to bring to the doctor who was avoiding coming in any time he saw I was there. I didn’t leave during the hospital visits; I was no stranger to the games that can be played sadly, so it was rare there was a direct interaction.
There was a time when I made them redo the prep for a procedure several times due to them not keeping the sterile field well… sterile. Basic stuff, and they should know better given they work in the OR as well. The nurse practitioner got mad at me and went, “Fine, you get the field set up then and show us.” She was baiting me, testing to see if I was holding them to the same standards I would hold myself to. Needless to say, I didn’t mess it up and cause yet another infection. They also didn’t mess up the sterile setups again either. You could see it on the faces of many of the regular liver medical team that they dreaded what was coming when I was there. It was obvious I had a lot more knowledge than they knew, and that made me an unknown factor. I do love being that. Keeps them on their toes.
The kidney team as well as hematology were amused when they saw me. They liked me and I liked them. The ended up being part of the team going forward after that one hospital admission. They should have been involved long before I went “Forgive me, I was not actually asking. I was being polite. You will get these second opinions from the appropriate specialists, it is not actually a request”. I hate it when I have to say those words with a burning passion because they should not be needed. So the new members to the circle of care also found it entertaining to hear how much of a pain in the ass I was from their colleagues. I get the feeling there were some not-so-nice things said about me. That is fine. I am not there to make friends; I am there to ensure proper medical care is gained or to help the patient better understand what the doctor is saying and encourage them to go with the advice. Nope, I am not always against the doctors, though at times it feels like it. When I am there as a patient advocate, no matter the connection to the individual, they become my patient.
Sadly, in this case, the damage had been done. We found out this liver doctor was a transplant specialist; we think she lost interest and wrote my friend off when he said he wasn’t ready to consider that option yet. Key word there would be “yet.” Due to her extreme negligence, it has led to a wrongful death. She thought she wouldn’t have to see me again after he passed. She thought wrong. I am ensuring every single thing that can be thrown at her is. If she did this to my friend, who else has she basically killed when they wanted to try other options first before going to organ transplant?
To this day, I have made doctors cry, some of the most notorious for the god complex. I don’t mince words. I do not sugarcoat things. I am polite, firm, and unyielding when I am making a point. I argue with logic and facts, hard to argue against those without looking like a fool. I have had to actually ask doctors point blank if they are trying to kill their patient and I always explain the why for my words. It is rare I have to get to the level I did with my friend and stay there thankfully.
I know the pain of losing a loved one, the loss I went through was ultimately the most likely outcome. However, that said, I saw the crap that would go on, the avoidance, the tunnel vision etc. When I was dealing with my loved one after awhile it was a game with the nurses to send in the residents who needed a good dose of reality, I didn’t mind at all. You develop connections when you see these guys more then you see your own family for years. I could tell when that was coming because there was always popcorn being made. I made a vow to myself to step in any time I was needed, to step up to the plate and use my knowledge to help others in any way I could when I realized I was good at it.
I do not always win, I do run up against the odd stubborn fool. Yes, fool, because they end up realizing I know patient rights a little too well and they catch trouble from their crap one way or another. However, I will never stop fighting for these people. I will continue to do this job for free because it does save lives among other things. It is not an easy job, not by far. It is easier to be the person being paid to do the actual job, instead of being the person who can only use words to make changes. However, these words are powerful in their own right.
So I do not need to think about what job I would do for free, because I already do it. I am still involved in the medical field, I still find other ways to help others heal. The job I do for free is not an easy one, not by far. However, I have a skill there, and with the god complex being such an issue in the medical field, my skills are needed. I long for the day the need for a patient advocate is no longer needed.What Job Would You Do for Free?
This is an easy one for me because I already do it. I currently work as a patient advocate, a role that doesn’t come with a paycheck but is incredibly rewarding. With my skills, life experience, and love for reading medical journals, it made sense for me to take on this role. As a patient advocate, I use my knowledge to help others navigate the complex healthcare system, ensuring they receive the care they need. It’s fulfilling to know that I can make a difference in someone’s life, even if it’s behind the scenes.
With all the skills I have, I often find myself called upon by friends and family, or those connected to me through someone I know. It doesn’t seem to matter what medical discipline is involved; I tend to leave an impression. I start by attending appointments as a concerned friend, asking pointed questions in a way that hides my knowledge but hints that I may know more than I am letting on. After all, you never reveal all your cards. It’s a bit like playing poker, but with stethoscopes and blood tests.
Sometimes, that’s enough to get things on track. Other times, I have to get really involved, such as in the case of a dear friend who was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver due to drinking. It bothered me when I heard about this, so I asked to see the past couple of years of medical records related to this. What I discovered is why I say, “Stop being a compliant patient” to anyone I can. The cause being attributed to alcohol is only done when all other causes are ruled out. It’s a diagnosis of exclusion. There were tests not done, some very basic tests. It turned out that because this friend wasn’t ready to go the transplant route, the doctor decided to write him off. There is no other way to put that one.
At the first appointment, I asked about the blood sugar levels and when they were last checked. I also inquired if it was checked on the genetic level for heavy iron in the blood. I mentioned that I found out about these issues through family who faced similar problems and knew that it could cause this. Yeah, that did not go over well at all. Though they sure rushed to cover their rear ends. Too little too late though. It turned out it was extremely high blood sugar that was the cause, and had that been treated, he would not have had an issue with his liver repairing itself. It was a classic case of the right diagnosis coming too late.
However, the story gets worse. At one of the last admissions, the team that was tending to him was the liver team. I had noticed issues with the blood work being ignored. It was like watching a suspense thriller where you know the ending is going to be bad, but you can’t look away.
The liver team was so focused on the liver that they missed some very big issues. I tried the pointed questions first, then I started to drop hints that I may actually know far more than I was letting on. The next step is revealing my background vaguely. I ended up being at the final step of “I was being polite when I asked. It was more of me telling you to do this.” and yes, I do say this.
See, his blood numbers were out of whack, which indicated that there was something under it all that was not being looked at. I demanded hematology get involved. They had a series of tests that they wanted run, and he also got the first of many transfusions that he should have been getting for quite some time. I also insisted on internal medicine and the kidney teams be consulted. It wasn’t that they had to come see him, but they were to be consulted. You do not focus on the easy answer ever in medicine. More often than not, when there is one issue, there are often other issues that can arise or are part of the delight of the body.
Turned out, due to the liver doctor driving it deeply into my friend to cut back on water more and more every visit—and the nurse practitioner was just as bad—they were never happy with how much fluid he was taking in and it led to kidney failure because it was always too much. Needless to say, my statement at the second appointment ever with those two when I said, “you will either love me, or you will hate me. The choice is yours,” was an understatement of our future interactions. Not only did they have to deal with the cirrhosis diagnosis, but now we also had to tackle the kidney failure they caused. To this day, I am unsure if it was neglect or intentional given the lack of follow-up and appointments that were going on and the pushback. Let’s just say it does not look good for them.
What was sick was at one hospital admission I had to park my ass in my wheelchair in the doorway of his hospital room in such a way that it looked accidental that I was blocking their way. They couldn’t easily leave without being obvious in their dismissal with the god complex raging cause they would have had to move me out of the way. They were forced to listen to why I wanted these teams consulted, and they were told why. By the time I was done, I think they were a little scared. The resident sure was, as anytime we saw him, he would look at me waiting for me to either stay relaxed or get what my friends call “that look” on my face.
So, I ramped up my involvement. I became a fixture at every appointment, every consultation, and every treatment discussion. I wouldn’t let them sidestep the issues anymore. I made sure every test, every possibility was explored. The resident, poor soul, looked like he was walking on eggshells every time he saw me, probably fearing what new demand or pointed question would come his way that he would need to bring to the doctor who was avoiding coming in any time he saw I was there. I didn’t leave during the hospital visits; I was no stranger to the games that can be played sadly, so it was rare there was a direct interaction.
There was a time when I made them redo the prep for a procedure several times due to them not keeping the sterile field well… sterile. Basic stuff, and they should know better given they work in the OR as well. The nurse practitioner got mad at me and went, “Fine, you get the field set up then and show us.” She was baiting me, testing to see if I was holding them to the same standards I would hold myself to. Needless to say, I didn’t mess it up and cause yet another infection. They also didn’t mess up the sterile setups again either. You could see it on the faces of many of the regular liver medical team that they dreaded what was coming when I was there. It was obvious I had a lot more knowledge than they knew, and that made me an unknown factor. I do love being that. Keeps them on their toes.
The kidney team as well as hematology were amused when they saw me. They liked me and I liked them. The ended up being part of the team going forward after that one hospital admission. They should have been involved long before I went “Forgive me, I was not actually asking. I was being polite. You will get these second opinions from the appropriate specialists, it is not actually a request”. I hate it when I have to say those words with a burning passion because they should not be needed. So the new members to the circle of care also found it entertaining to hear how much of a pain in the ass I was from their colleagues. I get the feeling there were some not-so-nice things said about me. That is fine. I am not there to make friends; I am there to ensure proper medical care is gained or to help the patient better understand what the doctor is saying and encourage them to go with the advice. Nope, I am not always against the doctors, though at times it feels like it. When I am there as a patient advocate, no matter the connection to the individual, they become my patient.
Sadly, in this case, the damage had been done. We found out this liver doctor was a transplant specialist; we think she lost interest and wrote my friend off when he said he wasn’t ready to consider that option yet. Key word there would be “yet.” Due to her extreme negligence, it has led to a wrongful death. She thought she wouldn’t have to see me again after he passed. She thought wrong. I am ensuring every single thing that can be thrown at her is. If she did this to my friend, who else has she basically killed when they wanted to try other options first before going to organ transplant?
To this day, I have made doctors cry, some of the most notorious for the god complex. I don’t mince words. I do not sugarcoat things. I am polite, firm, and unyielding when I am making a point. I argue with logic and facts, hard to argue against those without looking like a fool. I have had to actually ask doctors point blank if they are trying to kill their patient and I always explain the why for my words. It is rare I have to get to the level I did with my friend and stay there thankfully.
I know the pain of losing a loved one, the loss I went through was ultimately the most likely outcome. However, that said, I saw the crap that would go on, the avoidance, the tunnel vision etc. When I was dealing with my loved one after awhile it was a game with the nurses to send in the residents who needed a good dose of reality, I didn’t mind at all. You develop connections when you see these guys more then you see your own family for years. I could tell when that was coming because there was always popcorn being made. I made a vow to myself to step in any time I was needed, to step up to the plate and use my knowledge to help others in any way I could when I realized I was good at it.
I do not always win, I do run up against the odd stubborn fool. Yes, fool, because they end up realizing I know patient rights a little too well and they catch trouble from their crap one way or another. However, I will never stop fighting for these people. I will continue to do this job for free because it does save lives among other things. It is not an easy job, not by far. It is easier to be the person being paid to do the actual job, instead of being the person who can only use words to make changes. However, these words are powerful in their own right.
So I do not need to think about what job I would do for free, because I already do it. I am still involved in the medical field, I still find other ways to help others heal. The job I do for free is not an easy one, not by far. However, I have a skill there, and with the god complex being such an issue in the medical field, my skills are needed. I long for the day the need for a patient advocate is no longer needed.
Who am I? 
I would love to hear from you!